Let the games begin

The Olympics start Friday and NBC is not skimping on the Oly-themed shows. But we'll get to that later. I need a minute to finish gagging on all their "inspirational motivation". VOMITING!

"Lost" (ABC, 9:00): I finally figured out what they are doing this season. Aside from trying to give me a brain aneurysm, the writers are using a storytelling tactic called "flash-sideways". It's a season of "what ifs" vs. "what is" and the stories run parallel. Tonight's episode peel back the many layers of Kate and reveal how she and Claire would have crossed paths off the island.

After breaking free from the federal agent, Kate hijacks a cab with Claire in the backseat. Pause it: Obviously they are still in 2004 because there is no way a woman in handcuffs would get past airport security. *Montage of the shoe bomber, the underwear bomber and me sneaking my extra ounces of liquid onto the plane* On second thought ...

Ever since Claire disappeared on the island, Kate has been baby Aaron's second mom. After they were rescued, she passed him off as her own and raised him until they returned to the island. In the present, Claire was in Los Angeles to give her baby up for adoption but the couple backed out of the deal. She goes into labor and it's Kate who's by her side when she gives birth, just like she was on the island. Rewind: Did you catch that the man who delivered her baby, Dr. Goodspeed, was actually Ethan Rom? He's the man that kidnapped Claire on the island. Creepy!

I'm enjoying how the show is tying in how the characters would've still been connected even if Flight 815 hadn't crashed. It's also giving us a glimpse of how their lives would've been reshaped. In March, we'll get to see episodes centered around Ben (Mar. 9), Sawyer (Mar. 16) and Sun/Jin (Mar. 30). Executive producer Carlton Cuse urges viewer to forget about everything you've learned from previous seasons' flashbacks. "All that matters now are the flash-sideways stories," he says.

"The Biggest Loser" (NBC, 8:00): The teams head to the Olympic Training Center in Colorado to get inspiration from some of the country's top athletes. The teams move from pairs to individuals with two people getting eliminated this week. The person who falls below the red line goes home automatically and the two people below the yellow line are put to an elimination vote.

We already know that NBC is airing the Olympics. Do we really need to be subjected to an Olympic-themed episode of "Biggest Loser"? The only thing worth caring about was that hot potato figure skater. His name is not important. Just believe me when I say I'll be leading a one woman hotness parade for him during the pairs figure skating competition. He was smokin'!

At the weigh-in, the Red Team's Melissa gains a pound and is automatically sent home. Bye Bye. See ya! Don't let the door hit cha! I haven't disliked a contestant this much since Heba from a few seasons ago. Orange Team's Cheryl and Darrell from the Black Team fall below the yellow line and get a chance to fight to stay in an elimination challenge. They must keep their "Olympic torch" lit in a weird balancing act. Really? The results? To be continued.

Last chance rant: NBC, your pockets are showing! The network must be really hard up for money with all the freaking product placement ads on this show. If Bob tells me one more time to chew Extra Sugar-free gum I'm going to mash his face into my armpit and continue to eat my cake and ice cream. And how much do I hate Allison Sweeney as the host of this show? She's completely useless.

CHANNEL SURFING
Ellen's comic relief kept the mood light as the judges crushed the dreams of instant fame seekers on "American Idol" (FOX, 8:00). "You frightened me! Sexy and scary ... it's a fine line," she tells the obnoxious Skiiboski. I really wanted to see small town girl Vanessa Wolfe (of aeroplane fame) to make it through, but her nerves got the best of her. Best performance of the night was Janell Wheeler singing "American Boy" on acoustic guitar.

After these messages: Toyota is eating a big helping of humble pie, kind of like those Dominos Pizza commercials where they admit their crusts taste like cardboard, except Toyota's mistake might kill you ... I absolutely LOVE the Volkswagon "slugbug color" commersh. It was my favorite Super Bowl ad.