Resa's Rundown

I don't even know where to start. I really have no excuse for not blogging this week other than the fact that my work schedule has changed and I no longer have the time or energy to blog every night. I told myself that if I ever felt like this blog was keeping me from enjoying television then I wouldn't write. I'm not there yet, but sometimes I just want to enjoy mindless entertainment without the pressure of keeping notes. With that being said, I'll try to touch on some highlights from this week.

"Trauma" (NBC, Mon., 9:00): Once again, Nancy goes rogue and performs a risky procedure in the field. But this time it costs a young cheerleader her mobility when she's paralyzed from the neck down. Nancy's mentor and wannabe dad Joe suffers the consequences - he's fired as chief of surgery from the hospital after Nancy's real dad throws him under the bus.

"The Biggest Loser" (NBC, Tues., 8:00): I was so angry when Melissa, left, won her way back into the game last week, but I couldn't have been any more happy when she got her comeuppance for the third time! For the challenge, the first person to lose 2 percent of their body fat wins immunity. Melissa, the smallest player in the game, only needs to lose 4 lbs to win. But if they push the button to weigh in and miss their target, they are out of the competition. Bob warns Melissa not to lose sight of why she's on the ranch, but all she can focus on is game play. Sam ends up winning the challenge, dropping 10 lbs. in 4 days. After the rest of the contestants gang up on her during a swimming challenge, Melissa loses her second chance at immunity, and gets a one-pound disadvantage at the weigh in. She falls below the yellow line with Andrea and in her last ditch effort to stay in the game, tries to persuade them to keep her in the game because they can all beat her. It was a compelling argument but the losers didn't fall for it. They'd rather keep a harmonious house than have her negative, game-play energy infecting the house.

"The Good Wife" (CBS. Tues., 10:00): The show spins a different web as they tell the story from the perspective of the jury when a college student is accused of killing her roommate. I've been called for jury duty, but I've never served. This episode seemed like a very realistic portrayal of what might go down behind the closed doors of a deliberation room. Sadly, the accused girl copped a plea deal - 10 years for manslaughter - right before the jury came back to say she was found not guilty.

"Parenthood" (NBC, Tues., 10:00): The show got off to a slow start, but it's earned a spot on my do-not-miss list. Jason Katims, who serves as producer on one of my favorite shows ("Friday Night Lights") has definitely put his stamp on "Parenthood". It's poignant, it's raw and it's funny. "FNL" alum Minka Kelly guest stars as autistic Max's behavioral aide, Gaby. She's there to help the family cope with his asperger syndrome and mom Kristina feels the sting when Gaby is able to get Max to do things she's never been able to. Kristina's constant worry is also puts a strain on her marriage after she starts faking the big O during sex. Elsewhere, Crosby finally tells his parents that he's the father of a five-year-old boy and Sarah decides to go out with Amber's English teacher. I like this show because the family dynamic is so touching. It's nice to see a family on TV that actually loves and respects one another. If you haven't tuned in, do it soon before NBC pulls the plug on another great drama.

"South Park" (Comedy Central, Wed., 9:00): This had to be one of THE funniest (and true) episodes of all time! This spoof on the Facebook phenomenon has Kyle up in arms after his friends unfriend him because he friends a kid who has no friends. (Did you get that?) The whole thing just reinforces the idea that social networking is more about the networking part than it is about the social aspect. Here's a snippet from the show. The full episode can be viewed by clicking here.



"Ugly Betty" (ABC, Wed., 10:00): It's Hilda's wedding day and Betty finds herself with old flame Henry as her +1 after she drunk dials him during her trip to Paris. He shows up with his kid in tow and announces that he's moving back to New York just as Betty is offered a job running her own magazine in Paris. She accepts the position, setting up next week's series finale. Also, Justin comes out of the closet at the wedding reception, and Daniel realizes he has feelings for Betty. It's going to be a sad goodbye. *Single tear falling*

Blame it on the book

I have a new Wednesday work schedule that allows me to get home before 9:00 and what do I do? I opt to read a book and fall asleep. Reading is for the summertime, when there's nothing on TV except reality shows. It keeps the mind sharp, but it has the same effect on me as chamomile tea ... a slow descent into la la land. Kids, don't be fooled! Reading has a time and a place and it's not during primetime TV hours. This book had better be good. Here's a rundown of Wednesday night, Twitter style:

"America's Next Top Model" (CW, 8:00): Tyra sends home Iman-wannabe Simone instead of dry as powdered milk Anslee. The girls posed as vampires and Alasia gets the best photo for the second week in a row. (OK, that's like 2 tweets)

"Modern Family" (ABC, 9:00): The episode was a glorified promo for Apple's new iPad, but still funny as hell! It was so good I watched it twice. But seriously, how much did Apple pay for this blatant product placement? (That one is like the text message that's so long it comes over in 2 separate texts)

"Ugly Betty" (ABC, 10:00): The Suarez sisters travel to London for Hilda's bachelorette party. Betty scores an interview with a snazzy magazine editor, but turns down the job. And I think we can be sure now that Justin is in fact gay. Maybe.

My Superman sucks!

See, what had happened was ... I volunteer at a local high school, helping them put out their school newspaper. For the last 5 days, I have been up to my elbows in writing, editing and designing their paper! I haven't watched TV in 4 days!!!! YES, 4 days!!!! I'm still behind by about 3 hours on shows I watch, but I had to skip the Watch Parties so I could get some sleep. *Shaking my fists at Cleveland High School Newspaper Club!!!* Here's a recap of Wednesday night:

"Survivor" (CBS, 8:00): I almost forgot that during the NCAA Tournament that the show airs a day early, and they didn't skimp on the drama as we were hit with a double elimination.
After returning from Tribal Council, James asks Colby if he wants a hug. Now that Tom is gone, he's the last one standing in his little alliance. Candice says she had no choice but to vote for Tom for fear of calling attention to herself, while Amanda is secretly plotting her demise. At the Villains' beach, both Russell and B-Rob can't sleep so Russ approaches him to have a little conversation. B-Rob warns him that if he does indeed have the hidden idol, he should tightly hang on to it. "He's not playing with the amateurs anymore. He's playing with the big boys now," Rob says. Pause it: I read somewhere that filming for "Heroes vs. Villains" began right after "Samoa" ended so none of the contestants had seen Russell play. Otherwise, B-Rob would've been more careful with his choice of words about that hidden immunity idol. He has no clue who he's dealing with.

The castaways get a surprise announcement at the challenge: They'll be competing as individuals against their own tribemates for immunity, and both tribes will vote someone out at Council. The last person standing wins a hot dog feast for their tribe and gets to listen in other the other group's Tribal Council. The game is a rope obstacle course that Coach, J.T. and Tyson have all run before. (Tyson won the challenge the first time around). James showed that his bum leg wasn't much of a hindrance as he held a lead for most of the course. But it came down to J.T. and Candice at the end with Candice taking the immunity necklace. Rewind: Did anybody notice that the Heroes lost the coin toss, too? They couldn't win a game if they were playing against headless torsos. For the Villains, B-Rob, Tyson and Russell are even for most of the race, but of course, Rob pulls away for the win. For the final leg, it's Candice vs. Rob in a tri-level rope course. Candy looks tough to beat at first, but ultimately Rob prevails, winning the hot dog feast for the Villains.

After the competition, Colby realizes that Candice was only thing keeping him from going home because the other Heroes can't trust her. But her winning immunity leaves him in a vulnerable spot. He tells the tribe not to waste any time scrambling and vote him out. That way the Villains won't get any information about the Heroes and they can spend the rest of the day relaxing. He then retreats to the ocean where he spends the day floating and sulking. Pause it: Colby is totally having a hard go of it this time around. I know it's been 10 years since he's played the game, but damn ... he's useless. Even James points out that he came in last at the challenge, getting beat by a fat man and a cripple. "It's like my Superman sucks!" James tells him.

Amanda warns James that he's still got a target on his back and he needs to prove to the tribe that his injury isn't as bad as it looks. Oh, and stop stealing the bananas. She tells James there is a "banana etiquette" and that he should ask everyone if they want want one instead of taking three or four for himself. James later challenges J.T. to a race on the beach to prove he can run on his bum knee. A "Hero Olympics" of sort. James loses the race, but the tribe can see how badly he wants to be there, while Colby is basically resigned to his fate.

Back at the Villains' beach, the majority wants to get widow-maker Parvati out. Rob threatens Russell telling him "It's better to play with me than against me." Russell hates being bossed around and immediately runs to Parv, offering to give her his hidden immunity idol. Meanwhile, Rob has devised a plan to flush out the idol and send Parvati or Russell packing. They will split the votes three-to-three, forcing a tie-breaker vote. Either way, one of them will have to play the idol. Little does Rob know, Russ ain't no fool. He knows they can split the vote so he tells Tyson that he's voting with the bloc to get Parvati out. All the while, Russell, Parvati and Danielle are voting for Tyson to go.

At Tribal Council, the Heroes are forced to sit and watch as the Villains devour hot dogs and soda while Jeff Probst grills them about keeping James. He continues to point out that Colby doesn't have the same drive and stamina he had the first time around, this time comparing him to "Superman in a fat suit". Based on the vote, the Heroes decide they can't risk keeping James around hoping his knee will heal enough to help the tribe. He's once again taken out down by an injury. Pause it: I hope he uses his "Survivor" earnings to get some medical insurance. Sounds like it's time for James to have a yearly physical.

After the Heroes are done, the Villains take the Council stage. Sandra immediately calls Russell out on having the idol. He pretends to be surprised and continues to suggest that he doesn't have it. After the vote, he makes a grand production of playing the idol, but wait for it ... he presents it to Parvati instead. She plays the idol, making any votes against her null and void. For a minute there is a faint look of smug on B-Rob's face, but once Tyson's name is thrown into the mix, things don't look so good for his alliance. The vote is tied 2-2 and you can almost see Rob getting ready to give Russell a shove out the door, but the last vote has Tyson's name written on it. He fell for Russell's story about voting out Parv and switched his vote, setting up his own demise. It's a blindside for the "Survivor" history books.

B-Rob continues to impress me with his "back-to-the-basics" style of game play, but he's met his match in the equally duplicitous Russell, who will stop at nothing to be crowned sole survivor. Russell totally outwitted Rob, so it might be worth his wild to get over the whole "we-didn't-have-immunity-idols-when-I-played" crap and realize that this show has become a much more cutthroat competition. This ain't your daddy's "Survivor," buddy!

The tribe has spoken: WHY, WHY WHY does Amanda always look like she needs a Prozac IV drip full at Tribal Council? Has she not learned that those sad puppy-dog eyes do not work on this show? It's so freaking annoying!

CHANNEL SURFING

• If you are a hardcore "America's Next Top Model" fan, you would have recognized Cycle 11's Joslyn as one of the dates on "Millionaire Matchmaker" (Bravo, Wed., 10:00). And let me tell you, she was a lot more refined on this show than she ever was on "Top Model".
• Speaking of "Top Model" (CW, Wed., 8:00), Ren was dismissed after she admitted she was only there because her mom loved the show and as the family disappointment, she was getting more attention from her mother. She should've worked that out in therapy instead of national television.
• Some funnly lines overheard on "Ugly Betty" (ABC, Wed., 10:00): It's picture day at the Mode magazine office and Betty tells Marc, "I picked out a nice outfit," to which he tartly responds, "Aww, why didn't you wear it?" Later, Marc decides to "help" Betty's photo through some crafty work in Photoshop. "Marc, this looks nothing like me!" Betty exclaims. Marc: "You're welcome!" And finally, Betty gets her braces removed to which Wilhelmina barks, "Yes, yes, congratulations, Betty. Your smile will no longer induce seizures in children." I'm going to really miss the comedic timing on this show. They really know how to dish out the one-liners.
  

Timing is everything

It was a quick night, thank you Lord! I was three and out, just in time for reruns of "Will & Grace". I loves me some Karen Walker and Jack McFarland. But I digress. Let's discuss ...

"America's Next Top Model" (CW, Wed., 8:00): Tyra has definitely had some questionable model choices over the last 13 cycles, but she really outdid herself this season. There's something about these models that scream "low brow" and I'm not talking about the Groucho Marx eyebrows she let Raina keep after her makeover. The majority of them reek of poor taste while the others blend in with the wallpaper. I throw up my hands and jut out my hip.

It's the girls' first official photo shoot and they are thrown into the deep end right from the jump. They get to pick one item of clothing to model, but they must choose wisely because the rest of their body will be nude. Pause it: Those are accessories honey, not clothes. And ain't no bracelet big enough, no scarf long enough to cover up the hot messes that some of these models are.

My favorite girl so far, Gabrielle (right) opted for a pair of sequined leggings. She is uber cocky but I love her look. She looks like she could be in one of those posters I see when I walk past Abercrombie and Fitch or American Eagle. I like that she's so sure of herself, but in the world of reality competition shows, that's means she'll be on the chopping block.

The models were hoping that Angelea would choke, but she pulled off a fierce picture while modeling nothing put a pair of heels. My other favorite, country bumpkin Jessica, opted for a pair of shorts but was too worried about her granny seeing the pictures. Pause it: Get over it Jessie. You're on "Top Model" not "The 700 Club". My least favorite and most annoying girl, Alasia, was a train wreck, modeling a vest that she decided to wear backwards to cover her chest. Her pictures would've been much better had she just covered her face with it.

On the judging panel, Vogue editor-at-large Andre Leon Talley takes over for the flaming and flamboyant Miss J. Alexander, and Sally Hershberger, who did the girls' makeovers, is the guest judge. That Andre definitely adds something to the panel, although I'm not quite sure I like what he's serving up. He may be a little to sophisticated for the girls on this cycle with all of his French words and such. I had a hard time keeping up. And what was with all the blurring of the photos? On Ren's picture, all I could stare at was the big, pixelated blog on her thigh.I maybe mistaken, but I'm fairly certain that the va-jay-jay does not sit on the hip bone. What was up with that, Tyra?

My worst fears came true when Gabrielle and Alasia end up in the bottom two. I knew the judges were going to keep that annoying wench Alasia because Andre gave her lame photo a positive review while the other judges laughed at it. I hate the Gabrielle went so early. I think she definitely had potential to go all the way. *Shaking my fists at Mr. Talley*

In the second half of this overinflated episode, the girls practice their runway walks with "runway coach extraordinaire" Miss J. He tries to teach them that timing is everything by having them walk across a busy New York intersection while removing their coats.

For their first runway challenge, the girls get to model clothes for designer Rachel Roy. The model with the best walk gets to keep the garment she wears down the catwalk. The twist is that there will be two pendulums swinging at them from both directions. Good luck, ladies. Overconfident Alexandra, who by now has told us a million times that she's a perfectionist, falls not once, but twice on her turn down the runway. A few other girls are hit by the pendulum, but Alex is the only one who is actually thrown off the stage. Ginger-haired Brenda wins the challenge.

At the next photo shoot, the models pose for a beauty shot. Pause it: Well, as beautiful as you can be with water and wind being thrown in your face in 40 degree New York weather. This time it's Naduah's (above, left) turn to be cocky, saying that she's done so much modeling that she has this one in the bag. But at panel, it's Raina's photo that the judges fawn over while Naduah and Ren end up in the bottom two. Ren is saved even though she doesn't really want to be there, and Naduah is no longer in the running towards being America's Next Top Model. Good riddance to that boasting b*&#h.

"South Park" (Comedy Central, Wed. 10:00): With a subject matter like Tiger Woods and an episode titled "Sexual Healing", you have to expect some naughty innuendo. But leave it to Trey Parker and Matt Stone to find a way to make Tiger's infidelity society's fault because we "dangled the carrot". Pause it: I would beg to differ and say it was Tiger who was dangling the carrot, but this is a family blog.

In true "South Park" fashion, the writers treat sex addiction like it's an STD that the Center for Disease Control can handle. There's an "outbreak" of it among famous, wealthy men. They are the only ones who can catch it because "regular men just don't think of sex that often". Yeah right! And I'm sure they daydream about unicorns and rainbows!

The CDC decides to test the elementary school to see if any of the children are suffering from sex addiction. They flash an erotic photo in front of them then ask what color scarf the lady was holding. WOW! Poor Butters is mesmerized by the ... eh ehm, female nether region, making him test positive for sex addiction along with Kenny and Kyle. They enter "rehab" where they learn the cure for their disease is to avoid getting caught.

I laughed out loud for most of the show, but it's always the commentary that really cuts like a double-edged sword. On the one hand you've got Tiger Woods, who had no business doing what he did when he's got a wife at home. But on the other hand, what did people expect? He's still a man with a dangling carrot.

CHANNEL SURFING

• "Ugly Betty" (ABC, Wed., 10:00): As the show nears it's final episodes, the writers are going all out to tie up the loose ends. Hilda is engaged, Betty is undergoing a rapid transformation, and Justin ... well, Justin had his first kiss tonight - from a girl AND a boy! The writers are still being very ambiguous about his sexuality and I love that we know, but we really don't know. Know what I mean? And how much is the Watch Party going to miss the comedic duo that is Marc and Amanda? While on their way to the hospital to visit an ailing Willy, her doctor stops them on the street and warns the two about bringing her more work. "What are we supposed to do? Kill her?" Amanda asks. "Can't. She'll only grow stronger," Marc replies. Hi-larious!
  

After these messages: Surely I can't be the only one who has seen advertisements for schoolinpjs.com. Really? School in PJs? How does that look on a resume? Can you really get a job at Microsoft with that degree? "Yes, Mr. Gates, I'm qualified. I got my degree online through schoolinpjs.com." It makes the University of Phoenix look like Harvard Law School.

Weekend wrap-up

It seems like forever since I last blogged. Since I watch about 30 hours of TV Sunday-Thursday, I try not to turn it on on Fridays and Saturdays. Here are some thoughts about the weekend viewing:


"Ghost Whisperer" (CBS, Fri., 8:00): There was actually a decent plot, but I wish they would get to the gettin' with the Aiden storyline. It's far more interesting to hear a kid talk about the ghosts he sees than it is to see Melinda running all over town half dressed. We've all heard how kids are supposed to have some sort of sixth sense about these things. I just want to know if you're able to talk to spirits, is there ever such a thing as an "imaginary friend"? Rewind: I just realized why Aiden isn't believable as Melinda's son. He's supposed to be a 5-year-old, but his huge front teeth make him look at least 8 or 9. My dental assistant sister says it's normal for some kindergartners to have big teeth, but I want to see Aiden's driver's license! Also, has anybody noticed that ever since J.Love started dating Eli-portrayer Jamie Kennedy in real life, she has more scenes with him than with on-screen hubby, Jim? He came back from the the dead for Melinda and they have her running around with her Eli like they're Fred and Daphne.

"Ugly Betty" (ABC, Fri., 9:00): I hope you guys caught this episode because it was the first time the word "gay" was used in reference to Justin. I've been waiting for four seasons for them to address this topic! It's very telling that as viewers we automatically make assumptions about characters based on stereotypes. I'm pretty sure Justin is gay and just not ready to come out. But I'm basing my conclusion on the googly eyes he made at a male dancer last season, not because of his fierce fashion sense. After being named Homecoming Queen (yes, Queen) Justin turns the joke back on the student body by accepting the crown. When everyone is saying how proud they are, he squashes it with three words: "I'm not gay." Mentor Marc's reply: "Then he's not." I love both Justin and Marc, and it's been really fun watch Marc step in and be Justin's buddy as he transitions through high school. I even detected a bit of adoration slash crush in Justin's eyes when he was asking Marc for advice. I'll definitely be following this storyline to see if Justin gets his heart broken by an unrequited crush.

What do you guys think about Betty's transformation this season? I like this new confidence she has about her, but this physical metamorphosis she's got going on kind of takes away from the charm that is "ugly Betty". I'm guessing America Ferrera is getting tired of the braces. ... OH!! And who thinks Daniel is making a suicide pact and doesn't even know it!! Idiot.

"Medium" (CBS, Fri., 9:00): The most beautiful moment of this show came in the last 2 minutes when it's revealed why a teen aged boy spent his whole life thinking he was someone else. After he was born, his dead father would come to him at night and tell him about his life. ... because only children can see spirits. "Ghost Whisperer" and "Medium" go so well together!!!

Guess who's coming to dinner

I usually don't watch television on Friday and Saturday nights, but there I had nothing to entertain myself. (Sheepishly glancing at stack of books in my "to read" pile).

"V" (ABC, Tues., 8:00): I'm kicking myself for not taping the pilot when it first aired, and I'm karate kicking ABC in the stomach for waiting 5 days to post it online. That being said, "V" sucked me in as soon as that tall drink of mocha goodness, Morris Chestnut, entered the scene. Give me a minute while I enjoy this hot chocolate.

The show opens with what appears to be an earthquake but is really just 29 spaceships settling over New York and every other major city in the world. No big deal, right? Flashback: The scene looked like it was straight out of "Independence Day". A woman's face appears on the bottom of the ship proclaiming that they come in peace. Anna is the Obama of the visitors (or Vs) and wants to offer everything they know to us earthlings. Pause it: The Vs say they can cure 65 ailments. Do stretchmarks count as an ailment cause I need that remedy. I hope they take insurance. At the end of her speech, people were cheering and clapping. Really people? A SPACESHIP is hovering over your city. You stand there clapping. I'll in church repenting and making sure my insurance policies are up to date.

There were a lot of twists and creepy turns that come to a head at a secret meeting called by a man who says we shouldn't trust the Vs. A gunfight breaks out and I can't tell who's a V and who's a human. The only way to know is by the skull ... humans have one, Vs dont. So far I can see that Erica (Elizabeth Mitchell) and the priest are indeed human. But the rest of these people are a mystery.

This show sets up some very interesting conversation on religion, government and terrorism. Can we trust our government leaders at a time of crisis. How do you know if your next door neighbor isn't part of a sleeper terrorist cell (or an alien)? Does God accept those who only come to him in times of turmoil and for nothing else? I want to know the Vs are and I'm along for the ride on this spaceship!

Funny, funny: During her first broadcast interview, the Visitor High Commander Anna says that they want to offer medical care for everyone. The interviewer slowly replies, "You want universal health care?" (Good luck with that, lady!)

Team Players

Happy Halloween! I don't usually blog on Saturdays but I had to make an exception. I've seen some scary stuff today and we need to talk!

"Ugly Betty" (ABC, Fri., 9:00): This is my first time getting to review the show this season, and I'm happy to say it has maintained the sense of humor that I love so much. I still think Marc and receptionist Amanda have some of the funniest dialogue spoken on television. Betty has undergone a serious transformation, both inside and out. She's speaking her mind, standing up for herself and even wearing more fashionable clothes (even if they are still color uncoordinated). I like this new side of Betty. Let's just hope the writers don't muck it up by giving her a top model makeover.

Betty is falling behind in her duties as junior editor so Marc is made her temporary assistant. Still bitter over losing the position, he goes out of his way to prove she doesn't deserve the promotion. They later find out that Betty won the job in a coin toss, not because she was qualified. Pause it: How sucky would it be to find out you got your job because you were 'tails'? In the end, Marc helps Betty salvage her story (ironically on the 10 worst jobs in New York) from being cut from the edition and she shares her byline with him. Do you think Marc deserved the job over Betty? Do you know someone who's been promoted when you know they aren't qualified?

Who was that?: I barely recognized Jamie-Lynn Sigler ("The Sopranos"). She looks like Angelina Jolie in the movie "Gia"... Yes, that's YaYa from Cycle 3 of "America's Next Top Model". She's making quite a name for herself on the small screen.

"Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders: Making the Team" (CMT, Sat., 9:00): The candidates are fitted for their DCC uniforms and I can't think of anything more frightening than having to try on that skimpy outfit. Most of the girls are a size 4 or 6 but that's not good enough for Mrs. "Yes Ma'am" Kelli Finglass. She wants you to wow her when you put it on. Pause it: I'll wow you, all right, but not in a good way. And FYI Mrs. "Yes Ma'am" Kelli Finglass ... you may have been a size 4 when you made the squad *cough (in 1984)* but you are not one now *cough (size 8).

The girls also had to complete the Power Squad Army Fitness Test, given by DCC personal trainer Jay Johnson. Rewind it: "Wife Swap" fans will remember him from one of the episodes. To make the Power Squad, girls must do 2 minutes of push ups, 2 minutes of sits ups and a 2 mile run, earning 208 points out of 300. One girl missed said she only did 63 sit ups. Pause it: Don't feel bad, honey. Here are my stats - 4 push ups, 8 (and a half) sit ups and a run-walk to the refrigerator.

Three girls get called into the office: Bottom Heavy, Wet Noodle and No Can Dance. I don't know their names but this is how Mrs. "Yes Ma'am" Kelli Finglass talks about them. Noodle is sent home because she lacks performance power. No surprise there since the judges have been dissing her since day one. Next week the candidates take a 16-story leap of faith into a net. I'm sure Mika from "The Amazing Race" would just love this!