The takeover

Tuesday night became one of my worst TV nightmares when three good shows were airing in the 8:00 time slot. At one point, I was watching 2 shows on TV and one online. Craziness! Here's a rundown of what I was watching.

"So You Think You Can Dance" (FOX, 8:00): Once again the World Series throws off the schedule and the judges get to decide who gets cut. Noelle is back in the competition after sitting out last week with a bum knee, and Nigel says that network big wigs have cleared the way for ailing Billy Bell and his replacement Brandon to both return next year.

Season 5 dancers didn't live up to the judges hype, and Season 6 is leaving me feeling a little let down so far. Not by the dancers, but the choreography. Sometimes they go so far out into la la land with these concepts that they make it hard to showcase the dancing. Wade Robson's piece based on Van Gogh's Starry Night painting was over the top and complex. The hip hop routine put together by newbie Jamal Sims had too many props and the Bollywood number was more about the lighting than the dancing. Tyce Diorio actually put together a great Broadway number from "The Color Purple", but it was wasted on Bianca and Victor who brought no excitement to it.

The best performances of the night came from Legacy and Kathryn in a contemporary piece by Stacey Tookey, and Ryan and Ellenore in a sexy Argentine tango. Bianca, Victor, Phillip and Noelle are placed in the bottom four, and in the click of a shoe, 2 of the 3 tappers (Bianca and Phillip) are sent home. I wasn't fond of either of them but tappers are really at a disadvantage in this competition. You can barely hear the tapping and they aren't trained to move their bodies the way other dancers are. Last tapper standing Peter had better bring it once viewers get to vote. I suspect they feel the same way I do.

"Tabatha's Salon Takeover" (Bravo, 10:00): Does anyone even know who Tabatha Coffey is? I can tell you she was the resident bitch contestant on Jaclyn Smith's short-lived reality show "Shear Genius"; she's only famous for having a sharp tongue. That being said, I LOVE this woman! She's brash, sassy and tells it like it is. She's like my twin! (In a Village of the Damned kind of way.) In the Season 2 opener, she travel to Orbit Salon in Chicago where the owner is $750,000 in debt. 20 years ago, Orbit was the premier salon in Chicago, but now it's a giant hairball and owner Eddie has become a hoarder of hair products. His basement is stacked with $100,000 worth of retail items and personal junk.

Last season, people cried when upon Tabatha's arrived. The Orbit's staff cheered, but that excitement soon turns to embarrassment then anger after she lays into them about their technique and lack of pride in the salon. The place was a filthy mess with hair all over the floor, bathrooms that greet you with a smell and products caked with dust. Tabatha gives them a chance to prove their worth by bringing in patrons for the stylists to work on. Lindsay was not a fan of being told how to do hair so she storms out and tells Tabatha to "F*&# off". Pause it: Her tombstone will read "Here lies Lindsay. Tabatha f*&#ed her up." The staff has good hairdressing skills, they're just lazy. In the end, Tabatha shames ... er, motivates Eddie into becoming a better manager, and she brings Orbit back into our solar system by making the salon more chic and modern. Lindsay is shown the door for not being a team player. With that attitude I'm sure she's still unemployed.

This show may not be for everyone's taste, but you should watch it if only to learn what goes on behind the doors of your hair salon. Is the place you get your hair done in need of a takeover? If so then why are you still going there for service?

CHANNEL SURFING
On "The Biggest Loser" (NBC, 8:00), teams travel to Washington, D.C. to bring awareness to obesity and promote healthy living. Was it just me or was the usually void of emotion Alli a little more amped than usual? The contestants sit down with senators to discuss adding more physical education courses to school curriculum's, and later they make a salad from the White House garden. Pause it: WHAT? No appearance from the first lady? No glimpse of Sasha? Malia? Not even Bo? At the weigh in, Rebecca has immunity and Shay is still crying. Still. Crying. She breaks 400 lbs. by losing 9 and I'm proud of her for staying in the game. But it is weird to see someone happy about being 393 lbs. I'm just saying. Liz and Wild-Eyed Tracey fall below the yellow line and karma bites back hard when Tracey is sent home. A moment of silence for her maniacal gaze. May the wild eyes rest in peace.

"The Hills" (MTV, 10:00): To quench her pregnancy thirst, Spencer gets Heidi a pair of puppies for her birthday. Brody is on a break from Jayde so he calls up ex-girlfriend Kristin to be his date to Heidi's party. Audrina is still the dumbest girl on the planet when it comes to relationships. She's still carrying a torch for grease monkey Justin, even though he's using Kristin as his new doormat. My brain tells me to stop watching this show. My heart is in agreement.

Post traumatic stress

"Trauma" (NBC, Mon., 9:00) is one of my favorite new shows, and I forgot to watch last night. I guess once the news came down that NBC had pulled the plug on it, I mentally checked out. Thanks, NBC for breaking my heart. What are you going to do for your next act? Take grandma off life support?

There was a whole lot of trauma when Nancy and Glenn are sent on a run and their ambulance gets hit by a city bus. The scene was reminiscent of the season opener's helicopter crash where you're so caught up in the dialogue then BOOM! The action makes you gasp! Boone and Tyler were first on the scene and Boone gets to call the shots because he's a paramedic and Tyler is just an EMT. Pause it: Tonight I learned that the difference between a paramedic and an EMT is that a paramedic can "break the skin", i.e., give shots, start IVs, etc. EMTs are limited in the care they can give. Tyler wanted to take care to their own first, but Boone being the leader said they must stick to protocol and treat the most critical patients before Glenn and Nancy, who were alert and talking. I admired Boone as a true leader for staying calm and fair in a situation where he could have easily ignored the bleeding passengers on the bus and given all his attention to his friends.

It was an emotional day for all the medics as they were reminded of losing their friends in the copter crash. Nancy escaped with a ruptured spleen and Glenn suffered a head laceration and a fractured clavicle (that's a cut on the head and broken collar bone for all you medically challenged). They say doctors make the worst patients, but I thought it was very touching that Nancy didn't let Glenn know how badly hurt she was. He was already feeling guilty for causing the crash, even though they never reveal who was at fault.

I'm so mad at NBC for letting me get attached to a show then snatching it away. They are putting all their eggs in Jay Leno's basket, hedging that his show will be a success. So far the only thing it's been good at is getting better shows kicked off the air.

Watch this, tape that - Tuesday

Tuesday night is getting tighter with the addition of ABC's "V". And most of the good shows are 2 hours long so this is going to get dicey.

8:00
Watch this: "Biggest Loser" (NBC). Hopefully this is the night that Wild-Eyed Tracey gets the boot. The losers travel to Washington, D.C. for a meeting with members of Congress and a workout at the Washington Monument. Tell Sasha and Malia I said "hi!"
Tape that: "So You Think You Can Dance" (FOX). We're already down to 18 dancers and this week, the viewers decide the bottom two. It's not going to be pretty for the tap dancers.
See it online: "V" (ABC). In the series premier, an alien leader delivers a message of peace. If you're not into dance or losing weight you could watch this instead of waiting for it to post. I'm looking forward to it but it doesn't trump "SYTYCD".

10:00
Watch this: "Tabatha's Salon Takeover" (Bravo). The bleach-blond beast is back and she's revamping a Chicago salon in the Season 2 opener.
Tape that: "The Good Wife" (CBS). Alicia handles the appeal of a death-row inmate.
See it on repeat: "The Hills" (MTV); "Monica: Still Standing" (BET). Both channels will air these shows multiple times. You can also see them online.

Mundane Monday

Not much on in terms of quality television tonight so take you pick on this buffet.

"I Want to Work For Diddy 2" (VH1, 10:00): Like all VH1 shows, Diddy isn't happy with his picks from last season so they give him a second chance. Pause it: Will we be getting a dose of reality game shows with previous candidates vying for cash prizes? I'm part of the 5% of the population who actually admires Sean "Diddy" Combs. The story of how he went from a street promoter to a multi-million dollar mogul should be an inspiration to anyone who's ever dreamed big. That being said, he's still a cocky, mouth-breather.

In the season opener he makes the assistants spend their first night camped out on the roof of a parking garage. Then he breaks out his acting skills, giving interviews that are harsh, rude and emotional, to see how the candidates would react. One of the interview questions was to state in 30 seconds why Diddy should hire them. Pageant queen Noelle's answer: "Everybody loves an Asian girl." Pause it: No, sweetie they don't. Just ask Kim Jong Il. Oh ... wait.

The assistants are divided into two teams - Uptown and Downtown. For their first task they each must go onto the streets of New York and collect video of people speaking in foreign languages promoting Diddy's new album. Turn that down: I hope that 'Last Train to Paris' is leaving soon cause he's been touting this album for a while now. Underdogs Downtown gather the most number of languages and take the first win. Losing team Uptown picks Noelle and team leader Ivory to go up for elimination. Ivory is going to be one of many women playing the "angry black woman" role this season. She's like an aggressive pit bull - a loud bark and a lot of bite. Noelle is given the boot and can't work for Diddy. I guess not everyone loves an Asian girl.

CHANNEL SURFING

What was up with "CSI: Miami" (CBS, 10:00) stealing the plot from box office hit "The Hangover"? The CSIs had to recreate a night of botched bachelor party in order to find the missing groom. The only thing missing was Mike Tyson and a baby. "Miami" is my least favorite of the "CSI" franchise because I can't stand David Caruso in his portrayal of Horatio Caine. I think Caruso thinks that viewers love his one-liner-with-sunglass-removal schtick. Sorry to tell you, buddy: You're not in on the joke, you are the joke. (Insert one liner here).

Gosselins, Gosselins go away. Your 15 is up so take your pay.

It was the same statement, different interviewer on "Kate: Her Story" (TLC, 9:00). She's becoming a really good cryer, but she needs a dictionary and a speech writer for all the words she makes up. I thought Jon was the inarticulate one. TLC is doing their best to bleed this turnip. Next week we get an hour of viewers favorite moments. I'm sure I can name them all, as we've seen this "special" twice already. Move on, Gosselins. Move on.

Watch this, tape that - Monday

November is the official start of sweeps so while most shows will be breaking out the big guns, others will hit us with a few repeats. Here's what's on:

8:00
Watch this: "Lincoln Heights" (ABC Family). The show has redeemed itself and I'm watching it again. Cassie celebrates her 18th birthday in New York City.
Tape that: "Dancing With the Stars" (ABC). I'm not a fan, but my Aunt Sharron is having a small heart attack over it.

9:00
Watch this: "Trauma" (NBC). The network has cancelled one of the best new shows of the season. Better watch it while you can.
Tape that: "Gossip Girl (CW). Olivia comes down with foot-in-mouth syndrome on Jimmy Fallon's talk show. This is still CW right?
Also on: Another interview with Kate Gosselin. "Jon & Too Much Kate Plus 8" (TLC).

10:00
Watch this: "CSI: Miami" (CBS). A groom goes missing and the CSIs recreate his bachelor party to solve the case. How come I can't get a job like that?
Tape that: "I Want to Work for Diddy" (VH1). My favorite mouth breather is back for a second season, looking for the perfect new employee.

Clear eyes, full hearts: FNL is back!

SPOILER ALERT!! I'm watching "Friday Night Lights" on Direct TV's 101 network so if you're waiting until NBC airs the episodes in 2010, read no further!


My favorite show is back (and commercial free!) and not a minute too soon. I absolutely LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this show. It's the only one that I have ever purchased on DVD. It wasn't until the "FNL" theme song that I realized how submersed I am in this show. The people of Dillon, Texas, have become friends of mine. I identify with them because I was born and raised in a town just like Dillon. A place where football reigns supreme and people relive their glory days through their children. The acting is amazing, the emotions are true; it's very easy to get attached to the characters. What's hard is seeing some of my favorites gone - Tyra, Smash, Lyla and Street - but the series does a great job of slowly introducing new characters and allowing you to form new relationships with them.

When they left off, Coach Taylor had been fired and offered a job at dilapidated East Dillon High School. Redistricting has the town up in arms and parents are angry that their kids are being forced into a new district. Principal Taylor is torn between staying true to her school and supporting her husband, but after seeing Tami in action, it won't take long for the coaches at Dillon to see which side her bread is buttered.

At the first practice of the season, Coach has his work cut out for him. It only took 18 minutes for him to see that what he had to work with was a bunch of out-of-shape knuckleheads. Both schools had opening football games and the juxtaposition of the two teams was night and day. Dillon High has cheerleaders, a band and a TV crew while East Dillon barely had 20 people in the stands and wore miss-matched uniforms. We know how the game ends for Coach Taylor and the Lions, but I was praying to my Heavenly Host that the Panthers got their clocks cleaned.

With Riggins and Saracen graduated, a new string of football players emerge. J.D. McCoy is back and he's grown a pair since becoming a sophomore. We also get to meet his sidekick, Luke, and juvenile delinquent Vince Howard. Pause it: Some of you may recognize Vince as Reggie from "All My Children" or Wallace from HBO's "The Wire". I'm already attached to Vince because his portrayer, Michael B. Jordan, plays the rags-to-riches part so well. With Coach Taylor as his mentor I'm sure we'll be seeing more of the heart-wrenching scenes like we saw with him and Matt Saracen. With so many new faces it was nice to see Landry in the mix (what was the deal with everyone commenting on what a weird face he has?) Of course Julie is back and so are Matt and Tim Riggins, who dropped out of college after only 3 weeks.

"Friday Night Lights" is one of the main reasons I wanted to start a blog. It's the best show on TV that nobody's watching. If people would start watching this show with full eyes and clear hearts, they definitely can't lose! Stick around! This is one Watch Party you don't want to miss.

Sunday soup

Here's a mix of what happened Sunday night.

"The Amazing Race" (CBS, 8:00): Since we're down to only six teams I can start using the super cool names I've given them. These are the labels I gave them when there were too many individual names to sort out, and I readily admit they aren't politically correct. Shruggsies ... It's my watch party. Tonight, our tour around the world takes us to Amsterdam.

I was worried my Globetrotters (they brought their own nicknames!) were going to spend the episode making up for coming in last on the previous leg, but all the teams ended up on the same flight. Team Chip and Dale (Dan & Sam) decide to gay pride it out and the revelation is met with a variety of comments, the funniest being "That explains the matching swimsuits!"

At the Roadblock, teams must count bells while walking up a long flight of stairs. Team Zebra (Ericka & Brian) had to do it three times before getting the correct number. Pause it: I wanted to call them Team Jungle Fever, but since they anointed themselves Team Zebra early on, I'm rolling with it). Ericka's miscalculations put them 2 hours behind going into the Detour, and their bad luck continued when they didn't follow the instructions on the clue correctly. Chip & Dale breeze through and take first place, but Team Poker Face (Maria & Tiffany) couldn't complete either side of the Detour, opening the door for Team Zebra, who despite having to take a 30-minute penalty for the clue mishap, managed to come in 5th place. Team Poker Face calls it quits and it's one of the rare times where Phil shows up at the challenge to tell a team they've been eliminated.

I was just starting to warm up to the poker players. I didn't like their ways in the beginning, but they were a smart team and I thought this may have been the year an all-girl team could win. And I know that I say this every week, but seriously, could I love the Globetrotters any more than I already do? They are funny, kind and not to hard on the eyes. Flight Time can detour to my neighborhood whenever he's ready!!!

Geography lesson: Seaside retreat Zoutkamp Harbor was the pit stop for this leg of the race. It's located in the Groningen Province of the Netherlands.

CHANNEL SURFING
Did Tracie Thoms really leave "Cold Case" (CBS, 10:00) or is she "on a break"? ... Whenever I watch this show I'm reminded that there was once a time when files were hand-written, telephones had cords and women had to fight to be seen as equals. But the one theme that always rings true: murder is as old as Cain and Abel.

I heard some really funny banter on "Desperate Housewives" (ABC, 9:00). Gabby and Carlos were arguing about who taught their 7-year-old daughter the f-word. After a "blank"-filled tirade, Gabby finishes with "Fine, but I know someone who isn't getting blank tonight." Carlos says, "Fine with me. I blanked off earlier." ... Surely, Tom and Lynette are headed for divorce court. She's had his balls in a vice for so long I don't see how they managed to stay together this long. Must be for the kids.