Guys and dolls

Light night so I'm keeping it short and sweet.

"American Idol" (FOX, 8:00): At least 10,000 people turned out for the Atlanta auditions where Mary J. Blige joined the panel as guest judge. I'm not surprised that the Aye-Tee-El turned out a ton of talent. Seven of the 8 "Idol" winners are from southern states, although I wouldn't really consider Oklahoma as a southern state. (Sorry, Carrie Underwood). Jordin Sparks of Arizona is the lone outsider. I only watched 60 minutes of this extended show, but the part I did see made me proud to be a country girl.

Out of all the wacky people that trapsed in, only one audition really stood out to me. As I was listening to "country girl from the country" Vanessa Wolfe's sob story, all I could do was pray that she had some talent. It would've been a shame to sit through 2 minutes of her telling us how she wanted to break free from her small town only to have her be denied a ticket to Hollywood. And even though I didn't think her voice was that great , I still wanted her to make it through. "I'm gonna ride on a aeroplane!" she exclaimed.

I was shocked that annoying "Skii Bo Ski" could actually carry a tune, but oh so thankful that my recorder switched over to "Criminal Minds" before I could hear his spiel about how he's like a dollar store. Moving on ...

"Criminal Minds" (CBS, 9:00): I haven't watched this show in so long I've forgotten the names of the characters. I stopped watching this show for a period and after tonight, I remember why. Indeed, this had to be one of the creepiest episodes I have ever seen. I almost didn't finish watching it because the hairs on my arm were standing at attention.

Some crazy lunatic was kidnapping women, paralyzing them, then dressing them up like dolls. There was a lot of technical talk about physical immobility and mental awareness, but all I could focus on was how scary those girls looked. I don't know who those ladies were playing the parts, but if Emmys were handed for Best Actress With a Creepy Doll Face, those girls would definitely go home award winners. I will never look at a doll the same way again. Shudder!

Funny lines overheard on "Ugly Betty" (ABC, 10:00):

• "You're not paid for your voice, you're paid to imitate mine!" - Wilhemina to Betty after she pitches a story that goes against the one she was assigned.
• "The ingredients are chicken broth, evil and dirt." - Justin complaining about the taste of the soup Bobby brought over to cure his fever.

Best line from Simon Cowell: "It's like a cat barking." Where does his mind go to come up with this stuff?